Dear John, Addiction is a Disease and It Affects Her Brain.

From the article: Proof that Addiction is a Disease and How it Affects the Brain[1]:

The brain is a fascinating organ and is the central part of human thinking, behavior, emotion and longing.  Those with a genetic predisposition to addiction possess a brain that responds differently to certain substances or activities which are essentially objects of addiction.  Those who don’t suffer from addiction can logically understand the above but won’t be able to relate to the changes in the brain which makes the object of addiction virtually irresistible.  Thankfully, recovery is possible and people can overcome obstacles.  

The above paragraph comes to us from a rather scientific explanation of the brain and how it is affected by addiction.  Do you see the bold, underlined, italics section of the above paragraph?  When I read that, I knew that I had confirmation of what I wrote in this blog on December 12, 2017:

If those of us on the outside of addiction looking in can just accept the fact that there is a mystery there that we cannot and will never fully understand, then there is a chance that we can more readily accept the addicted person as being fully human and worthy of dignity, honor, respect, and love.

Let's take this conversation further.  In this same article, the following can be found:

The brain’s ability to adapt (allostasis) causes significant changes to how it functions. These changes account for multiple behaviors related to addiction. These include

1. The compulsion to obtain heroin, drugs or engage in destructive activities despite harm to self, family or friends

2. The increased level of difficulty associated with quitting heroin, drugs or risky activities

3. The obsession related to the object or activity one is addicted to making everything else in life unimportant. This is because addiction created a chance in the brains homeostatic balance to accommodate addiction. The brain affected by addiction requires the object of its addiction in order to maintain this new homeostatic balance.

Emphasizing again my bold, italics and underlined section of this quote, this explains why the devout Roman Catholic young woman will humiliate herself by "dating" so as to financially support her addiction.  It is not the drive to financially support her addiction that causes her to "date" nearly as much as it is her altered brain state that gives her no choice but to "date."

Dear John,

The young woman you are with tonight is addicted most likely to heroin.  No woman will humiliate herself with you without this addiction.  Her addiction which started the day her uncle raped her when she was 9 years old or when, as a star athlete in high school, slid into third base the wrong way and badly broke her leg and ended up on Percocet that led her to heroin is with you right now because her brain's circuitry has been severely altered by this heroin use.   Yes.  She needs your money to buy her medicine to keep from becoming dope sick.  More to the point, John, her brain is currently not capable of preventing her behavior with you even with understanding the wrongness of what she's doing.  You are taking advantage of her current cognitive medical illness.  

Stop!

Sincerely,

Chris

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[1] http://killtheheroinepidemicnationwide.org/2016/08/05/proof-addiction-disease/